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Kitty Glitter
Yay.
I'm back.

Tuna/mandarins/coffee and herbal tea.
I want to loose as much as I can in a week.
I'm not gonna go by weight because I am training too and muscle weighs more.
I am just gonna guess.
Also I am so fucking poor I cannot afford to pay a dollar to use the fucking scales at the chemist.
Oh well, being poor helps me eat less. heh.

My ex who I am still totally obsessed with is seeing a TINY fucking teenager. wtf. If that is not motivation then what is.
She must be like 50kg max.

I don't even want to know how big I am atm.

Mood variable: depressed depressed

tell me lies
My mum threw a huge crying fit at me for not looking after myself and made me eat a platefull of meat and vegetables.
And now I can't stop being hungry, Fuck it.
I was so good at forgetting to eat.

But on the plus side, I realized that maybe i do need a bit more food than i have been eating.
Because my brain has suddenly started to function...

So maybe some sort of balance between no food and binging like I am now. ha!

Also I have been researching breast implants and I have decided I definitely don't want them, my main reason was finding out they are cold! Touching breasts is fun because of how warm they are. i don't want people to think of cold meats when they are groping me...

Gah, I'm actually still not sure...because I have groped an implant or two in my time and i definitely wasn't grossed out. But the fact that they are so risky on top of that is putting me more on the ..not getting them side of the fence.

Mood variable: pessimistic pessimistic

tell me lies / tell me lies
I was all happy about getting down to 55kg, but I am having a major fat day today.
I'm sure all the weight I lost is of my legs and tits.
My stomach is still huge.

All I ate today was:

Gluten free muffin
Banana
3 crackers

And I feel like a huge obese fucking whale.

So unfair.

I ate nuts at work last night cause i figured I'd dance it off, but maybe not.

I wish I had scales at home.
Every time I have to weigh myself it is at the chemist.
So I never get to weigh myself naked either.

I should buy some scales.

grooooosss...I feel so bloated.

Mood variable: lazy fat
Theme music: electrocute

tell me lies
The.....internet...is....slow.

But I'm down to 55kg...what's that...121lbs

Which makes my bmi = 17.4 (I'm 5'10)

Underweight is = <18.5

I feel as though i have acheived something for once!

Main probelms: cold and memory loss.

This site is super super helpful:

http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=201798919&MyToken=def1a8b6-38f7-457a-ae23-54bddd6ac91a

Mood variable: accomplished accomplished
Theme music: Mickey Avalon - So rich So pretty

tell me lies / tell me lies
I wrote a note on my hand: "stop eating food"
it works well.
I've only been eating before work.

today:

banana
rice pasta
smoothie
tell me lies
It was a damn wierd night I tell you.

There was a bunch of barely out of high school kids, only just 18 I imagine. Our bouncer is very strict so I'm sure they were 18, or at least had convincing fake ID's =/
They had just left their school social and they were all dressed up in three piece suits and they had obviously never been to a strip club before in their lives.

The most amusing thing to happen with their group is when Bonny and I did a double glow-paint show and the girl that was with them kept screaming "Look at the lesbians! look at the lesbians!" haha hilarious.

My friends ex boyfriend turned up. I think he was hoping to score...ew weird. I just tried to ignore that and treated him as if I didn't know. But he tried to ring me and stuff after he left...and after I told him I was taken and pretty much spent the whole time talking about his ex girlfriend. In some cases this could be flattering, but no, not this time.
I met him at the same time as his ex/my friend, my friend liked him and I was following him around because if I flirted with him he'd give me drugs. And those two ended up together, so he chose her...so what am I second place?! Also it is vaguely offensive that he thought that I would score someone that had been in such a serious realationship with my friend, even if I don't talk to her much anymore...I have invisible barriers that stop me even looking at my friends partners and ex-partners.
*sigh*

Also I got a lapdance with this german santa claus look-a-like and he kept saying "I love you my darlink" and "You have a beautiful...titties". And a lot of other stuff that I really didn't understand.
It was wierd...and amusing I guess.

A few things I was proud of last night: I made lots of money, got the most dances, I'm back into choreographed dances even though I haven't done them for a year, and my friends ex...even though he was a creep he did say that I looked like I needed to eat a few pies. Haha yay I'm skinny.

I really need to weigh myself. >_>

Mood variable: tired tired
Theme music: Missy Elliot

tell me lies
I went away and had the worst holiday of my life.
I was caught in a huge storm and we were flooded in with no power, running water, phone (no internet!!!!) and all the while my family were stuffing food down my throat. And of course my sister constantly bakes cookies and cakes so I put on a few up there..oh yes I did. =/

I haven't been able to weigh myself since I got back. My boyfriend says I have lost weight but I doubt it because when I got back he kept making lasagne and fudge....to bad foods that are very hard to say no to.

But I'm back at work now so at least I might be able to get fit again.

I had a plate full of greens for dinner and an apple, and now i'm off to shake my arse for money for 8 hours straight.

There's this internet website I have been looking at that apparently trains you to lose fat and gain lean muscle etc. But it is linked to the infamous "idiot proof diet" so I am not sure how trustworthy it is. =/
They have a free trial so I might give that a go, but the actual thingee-whatsit is $99 so yeah...bit steep.

I'll weigh myself and do bmi next week.

Mood variable: indescribable fat
Theme music: rasputina

tell me lies
I've kind of lost track of all my food...an i'm getting bored of lists anyway...but i'll keep track of my weight on here and I am still dieting in pretty much the same way.
(although it's THAT time again and MY GOD I want to devour a mountain of chocolate)

I'm thinking of going back to work.
But I want to change my name to Ivy this time.
Gonna ring the boss lady when I get back into town.

I'm gonna be flying in a plane on Friday the 13th...lucky i'm not superstitious.

Hopefully at the time I will be dressed in a half-man half-woman suit on the plane as I am going to my friends friday the 13th birthday party when I get back. Haha it will be awesome. =)

Mood variable: crazy schizo

tell me lies
I weighed myself today...

..And I'm down to 130lbs!
wow in less than 2 weeks I've lost about 14lbs!
I rock.


(still looks bad to me though...maybe i'm just losing muscle)

Today (so far) I ate:

2 mandarins
1 stick of celery
100g of mixed raw nuts
150g rice crackers (the super healthy dog-biscuit-esque variety)
1 apple
2 cups of lemon and ginger tea
1 cup red bush tea
600ml of water

...I was naughty with having the rice crackers AND the nuts on the same day, but it was freezing today and I had to walk to school and back (40 minutes each way)....so that's my excuse)

Mood variable: accomplished accomplished

tell me lies
Yesterday I ate:

2 bowls of brown rice. (1 bowl = 1 cup)
Half a zucchini
1 capsicum
4 Brussel sprouts
4 cups of red bush tea
1 cup peppermint & chamomile tea
6 cups of water
(&I exercised.)

Today I ate:

1 bowl of brown rice
1 106g tin of sardines (in light olive oil)
2 mandarins
1 apple
3 cups of red bush tea
2 cups of lemon and ginger tea
4 cups of water

(didn't exercise.)

I think I'll weigh myself at the mall tonight when I go grocery shopping. There is a weight and height thing there and it only costs a dollar. I might scan it and post it and then get one a week for progress....

EXCEPT....dun dun dun...
I have to go stay with my family for 2 weeks including my Grandmother who always tries to force food down my throat. I'm just gonna have to be sneaky. If I don't mention food maybe they will forget about feeding me? hope so.

Think I'll go to the gym tommorow after school if I have time.
tell me lies